Coyne’s Rule of Conversation

Along with the other rules I’ve proposed (e.g., “button your shirt from the bottom up and you’ll never mis-button”), I have one that I’m sure I’ve mentioned here before. However, the pandemic seems to have had a lasting effect on the incidence of logorrhea, and so I will propose this one again, with a couple of qualifiers. First, the rule, which is mine. It’s coming.  Here it is:

In general, in a conversation between two individuals, you should limit yourself to no more than three sentences in a row before the other person gets to speak.

There are of course exceptions.  If someone is telling you a story, giving you instructions, or has a problem or is distraught, then, yes, they can speak longer and you should be more patient.  Or if you’ve being interviewed, you can go longer, for they can cut the transcript; and anyway, the purpose of an interview is to give the interviewee more airtime than the interviewer.

I’m sure there are other exceptions as well. What I am referring to is polite social discourse, which should involve an exchange between individuals—a fair exchange. I’m sure you’ve chafed when someone runs on and on and on, which seems self-absorbed; so you understand the value of “fair conversational exchange. I have found that three sentences is about the optimum length to ensure a decent conversation, but of course remember that this rule reflects my judgement and limited patience.