A bride chose the first wedding dress she tried on and paired it with a veil made by her grandmother

In November 2021, Bourgeois Pepke, 29, and Pepke, 32, crossed paths at a bar. Bourgeois Pepke immediately caught Pepke's eye, but they didn't speak that night.

Instead, Pepke reached out to a mutual connection he knew could get him in touch with Bourgeois Pepke: her sister. Soon, they were chatting back and forth, and in March 2022, they finally went on their first date.

"We just never stopped dating," Bourgeois Pepke told Business Insider. "Our first date was like 8 hours long."

The pair became an item but were long-distance for a few years, as Pepke was based in Los Angeles while Bourgeois Pepke lived in Southern California.

After two years of long-distance dating, they bought their first home together in February 2024 in San Juan Capistrano, California, where they still live today. Bourgeois Pepke works in home restoration and as a content creator on TikTok, while Pepke is a cinematographer.

"We went there to pick up the keys, and he dropped to his knee," Bourgeois Pepke said of the proposal.

Bourgeois Pepke was thrilled, but she didn't think she wanted to have a wedding. She wanted to save money for their house instead of spending it on a big wedding, particularly because she has a large extended family.

"We were supposed to elope and go to France," she said.

However, as they talked through it more, Pepke shared that he wanted to celebrate with a wedding.

"He convinced me, long story short," Bourgeois Pepke said. "I said, 'OK, but if we're going to do it, we're not doing cheesy, corny wedding trends. We're going to do it our way. If we're going to move forward with it, I want to ease the anxiety as much as possible and save money as much as possible.'"

They tied the knot on November 9, 2024.

"I don't want to say I'm anti-trendy, but I just didn't want it to feel like it was going to be out of style in a year," Bourgeois Pepke said of her vision for the wedding.

"And then Sam is very intentional," she said. "He's the most intentional person ever, so those two combined, I think, would be the best way to describe the wedding."

They got married at McLaughlin Estate, a family friend's home in San Juan Capistrano, with around 160 loved ones in attendance.

Bourgeois Pepke didn't hire a wedding planner; she put the wedding together herself with the help of family and friends, thrifting much of the decor and adding touches that reflected her relationship with Pepke to the day wherever possible.

Much like her wedding, Bourgeois Pepke wanted her dress to stand the test of time.

"I looked up old Hollywood, classic, tasteful dresses," she said. "It was very covered and high neck, and I wanted that to be the representation of my wedding, too."

Bourgeois Pepke went shopping with her best friend, thinking she would just get a feel for what kind of gown she liked.

However, when she tried on the Willa dress by Casablanca Bridal, she fell in love.

The sheath-style satin dress featured the high neckline Bourgeois Pepke was looking for, and it dipped low in the back. The skirt flared slightly at her waist to create a subtle train.

"I was like, 'Oh shit, I really like this,'" Bourgeois Pepke said of her reaction to the dress. "I thought, 'I should call my mom. I feel bad now, no one's here that should be here.'"

Bourgeois Pepke called her family, and her mom, grandmother, and sister joined them at the store. She tried on a few other dresses so her family could see some options, but she knew the Willa was her dress.

"I like that I haven't actually seen it a lot," Bourgeois Pepke said of her gown. She loved that it had the same silhouette as bridesmaid dresses, but wasn't as familiar for a bridal look.

"I think sometimes, people get turned off to more 'casual' dresses," she added. "You almost feel drawn to wearing a bigger dress because you never really get to other than your wedding day."

But for Bourgeois Pepke, the selling point was the gown's simple and relaxed silhouette.

"It was so me," she said.

The back of Bourgeois Pepke's gown dipped low, and the halter neck was tied with long ribbons, adding volume to the gown.

"It was like business in the front, party in the back," she said.

Bourgeois Pepke also liked that you could be creative with how you tied the ties, allowing her to personalize the dress.

"I like the simplicity, but then there are those little tweaks you can make to it to make it still feel unique and different," she added.

In alterations, Bourgeois Pepke added a snap to the ties so they sat flat, giving her the look she wanted.

"It was perfect," Bourgeois Pepke said of her gown. "It was so comfy, too comfy. I apparently had too much fun in it and stained it everywhere."

Bourgeois Pepke said the hem of her dress was covered in grass stains after her wedding, but she didn't mind.

She also ordered the dress a bit large, which created the sheath look she wanted for the gown and made it even more comfortable.

Thanks to some negotiation from her best friend, the dress cost Bourgeois Pepke $1,250.

Bourgeois Pepke's grandmother, Shirlee, has always loved making clothes for her grandchildren.

"She made all of our Halloween costumes. She made all of our bedding," Bourgeois Pepke said. "When we would go to her house in the summer, if we didn't have a bathing suit, she just sewed one up."

Bourgeois Pepke hoped her grandmother might make her a veil after she made her a statement scarf to wear to her bridal shower, but she didn't want to ask, as she knew it could be time-consuming for her grandmother to sew these days. To her delight, she and Shirlee were on the same page.

"She was teaching me how to tint white clothing with steeped tea bags over my stove," Bourgeois Pepke said. "I was dumping all of my fabric onto my stove, and we're sitting there having a moment. She's like, 'I'd love to make your veil if you'd let me.'"

Bourgeois Pepke immediately accepted the offer and gave her grandmother full creative control.

"We went to the fabric store together, and I told her, 'I like texture. I want this to be the statement. I want it to be fun, but I want it to still feel timeless, and I want to feel like me,'" Bourgeois Pepke said. "And then she came up with it on her own."

The cathedral-length veil was covered in large flowers of various sizes. It was also trimmed with a thicker lining to make it pop.

Bourgeois Pepke adored the veil, and the significance of Shirlee making it made her love it even more.

"It was so emotional," Bourgeois Pepke said. "And then she put it on me too, which was super emotional."

Bourgeois Pepke hopes to someday turn the veil into a canopy for a baby's bed.

Bourgeois Pepke wore comfortable shoes, which she thrifted. She also thrifted the pearl earrings and bracelet that she accessorized with.

Bourgeois Pepke and Pepke also selected antique wedding rings, buying them from Jewels by Grace.

Initially, Bourgeois Pepke planned for Pepke's sister to do her makeup, as she's a professional makeup artist. After they did a trial, Bourgeois Pepke felt beautiful — but not like herself. The experience also made her remember that she feels "antsy in a makeup chair."

"I was like, 'Oh my, this is going to make me feel crazy on our wedding day,'" she said. "I have always loved sitting and doing my own makeup, so I was like, 'I'm just going to do it myself.'"

Bourgeois Pepke used the Makeup By Kelli Anne app to create her beauty look, buying the exact products the program recommended. She tested her makeup for her rehearsal dinner and loved how her natural, glowy look came out.

The bride's sister, Ryan Bourgeois, styled her updo for the big day, and she got ready with her best friends, grandmothers, and mom at El Caminante Bar & Bungalows.

"It was just all my best friends getting ready, showing the dresses we were wearing," she said. "It felt like we were getting ready for a school dance."

"I didn't feel like I was constantly pulling it up, pulling it down, needing to pose in a certain way to make it look good," she said. "I'm very happy I chose something that genuinely is me and my style because I didn't have to think about it."

Bourgeois Pepke thinks the confidence her gown gave her shines through in her wedding photos, which Ally Rabon Photo took.

"I can tell in the way that photos were captured that I feel so comfortable in what I'm wearing, and I'm just glad I didn't take any crazy risks with it because it made me feel very confident," Bourgeois Pepke said.

Instead of exchanging personal vows during their ceremony, Pepke and Bourgeois Pepke said them in private ahead of the wedding.

"We did our vows together in the morning, but I was straight out of bed," Bourgeois Pepke said. "I hadn't even brushed my teeth."

They also said traditional vows during the ceremony.

Bourgeois Pepke did a first look with her dad instead of her husband-to-be, which was one of her favorite moments of the day.

Pepke, who wore a Banana Republic tuxedo to the nuptials, saw Bourgeois Pepke in her wedding attire when she walked down the aisle, and he had the emotional reaction she was hoping he would.

"He was bawling his eyes out," Bourgeois Pepke said of his reaction. "And then I was laughing at him, which is horrible of me, but I'm cracking up. I feel like you talk about it with your husband. You say, 'Do you think you'll cry?' or, 'I hope you cry.'"

"We couldn't even start the ceremony because we all started laughing because I was like, 'Oh my God, you cried. I'm so happy,'" she told BI.

The couple said their vows outside. Spencer Pepke provided sound for the event.

Pepke has been making Bourgeois Pepke bouquets since they started dating, so it felt natural for him to make her bouquet for the wedding day.

For the arrangement, he picked flowers that made him think of Bourgeois Pepke.

"Because he lived in LA and I lived in Orange County, when he would drive along the freeway, he'd notice the native flowers of California," Bourgeois Pepke said. He used those flowers for her wedding bouquet, bringing the moment full circle.

Bourgeois Pepke's grandmother also gave her a ribbon from the year she was born to wrap around the bouquet, making them even more special.

Bourgeois Pepke's friend, Kayla Moshier, did the rest of the flower arrangements for the wedding.

"We went to the wholesale store," Bourgeois Pepke said of the flowers. "It saved us a lot of money."

Because they didn't exchange personal vows at the altar, the Pepkes' officiant led the ceremony by sharing their love story.

"We had our pastor email us and ask for our version of how we met," Bourgeois Pepke said. "I wrote to him how we met, and Sam wrote to him how we met and our first impressions, and then he told the stories from our point of view at the altar."

"It was hilarious because we had very different first impressions of each other, and we'd never heard those versions before," she said. "It still gave comedic relief that I think vows typically do without me having to be the comedian, which took a lot of pressure off of me."

The reception also took place outside. Guests sat at family-style tables under twinkly lights, and a portion of the yard turned into a dance floor.

The couple designed their tablescapes, and Bourgeois Pepke thrifted the decor.

"It took me a long time to get everything for it because I had to source everything," she said.

Ashleigh Moore was the couple's day-of coordinator, and Bourgeois Pepke said her girlfriends set up the tables for the event. They also turned their guests into subtle decor.

"We asked all of our guests to wear fall colors because it helps when people are taking photos," she said. "Your guests are almost like decor, and everything flows together."

For instance, they have a favorite taco stand in their area, and they hired the woman who runs it to cater the wedding and engagement party.

They served quesadillas, tacos, beans, and rice, and they encouraged people to bring their own food if that wasn't their preferred cuisine.

Los Golondrinas also provided food for the cocktail hour.

Likewise, Pepke is a cinematographer, so they didn't hire a videographer for the wedding. Instead, they passed around a home video camera and are turning it into a video themselves with the help of Jake Wolfert and This Union Films.

Bourgeois Pepke's dad gave a 30-minute speech, which she loved.

"You are lucky if you have a line full of people that want to get up and talk about you, especially you and your relationship," she said. "That's such a blessing."

"Let people talk if they love you," she added. "That's a gift. Don't worry so much about how your guests are going to feel. I think if you do focus on yourself and what you and your partner love, that translates, and then people have the best time because they're going there with the intention of it being your party."

"All of the desserts were made by friends and family," Bourgeois Pepke said of their dessert spread at the wedding.

"My boss, who is amazing, made 15 chocolate-chip banana breads because it's my favorite that he makes every year," she said. "My mom made brownies. My mother-in-law made ginger snaps. We did a few of our favorite childhood and current favorite desserts, and everything had a little bit of meaning behind it."

They also had a small cake to do a traditional cake cutting.

As the night progressed, Bourgeois Pepke and Pepke took to the dance floor with their loved ones.

"We also asked our friends their favorite parts of our house parties or things that they like, and we implemented those," Bourgeois Pepke said. Music was a common response, so they played a mix of their favorite tunes.

Cuban, Spanish, pop, and retro music from the '40s and '50s was played at their wedding.

The Pepkes' friend, Vinka De Vis, who also helped with event design, was their DJ.

"We spent, full transparency, $22,000 on our whole wedding," Bourgeois Pepke said. "That's including my dress. That's including boarding my dog. That's including everything."

"You don't have to spend $100,000 to get married," she said. "Don't put yourself in debt."

Bourgeois Pepke also used a travel credit card for many of the wedding purchases, which helped her save money for their honeymoon even as they spent on the wedding.

Because her dress had a more casual look, Bourgeois Pepke plans to hem it into a midi dress so she can rewear it. But first, it will become a family heirloom.

"I'm going to give it to my sister to wear for her rehearsal dinner for her wedding," Bourgeois Pepke said. "She's a little bit shorter than me, so it'll still be longer on her."

Bourgeois Pepke also plans to hold on to the dress in case she has a daughter someday.

"He is the most intentional person I've ever met in my life," Bourgeois Pepke said of her husband. "With every decision he makes throughout his day, he is thinking about me."

"Everything is about our future, about building our life together," she added. "He is so patient. He is so kind. He's very, very, very, very smart. He wins trivia every time we go. It's almost embarrassing. He is my sweetie pie. I love him so much."