How can I more clearly ask people to accommodate for my autism?
I've got autism. This isn't always clear to people*. Sometimes I need accommodations for a sensory issue to participate in a normal way. One time, there was a colleague with a strong aftershave, for example, who needed my help. Sometimes these conversations go like this: Me: I'm so sorry, your aftershave is causing some sensory issues for me. I've actually got autism and I've got trouble with some strong smells. I would really appreciate if you could tone it down a little in the future. Them: Oh, I get a headache from strong smells too sometimes. A painkiller usually solves it. Or Them: Wanna see New Movie tonight? Me: Sure! Shall we go to Cinema X? It's a little bit further of a drive, but we can use my car. They have those chairs where the people next to you don't touch you, while the closer Cinema Y does not. I don't like touching, you know. Autistic -smile-. Them: Stop being such a snowflake! Everyone else can deal with those chairs, I'm sure you can too. I'm aware I'm asking them to do something for me with nothing in return, but it really is a big deal for me. How can I achieve this better? *This means, in simple terms, that I have more brain-connections, which means I can easily get overstimulated. My brain uses more resources than for most people, which means I get tired faster. In very rare cases I can have an autistic meltdown, where some parts of my brain, like the language processing part, shut down. Sometimes autism causes underdeveloped social skills and/or language skills. It's different for everyone. I lack most of the autism traits you see in the media. My social skills are a little below average, but far from bad. Because of this, people tend to question whether I really have autism. This seems to stem from a misunderstanding of what autism really is. I often get told "Oh, but you're so social!". I usually answer by explaining that social skills can be learned and that I've got sensory issues.
I've got autism. This isn't always clear to people*. Sometimes I need accommodations for a sensory issue to participate in a normal way.
One time, there was a colleague with a strong aftershave, for example, who needed my help.
Sometimes these conversations go like this:
Me: I'm so sorry, your aftershave is causing some sensory issues for me. I've actually got autism and I've got trouble with some strong smells. I would really appreciate if you could tone it down a little in the future.
Them: Oh, I get a headache from strong smells too sometimes. A painkiller usually solves it.
Or
Them: Wanna see New Movie tonight?
Me: Sure! Shall we go to Cinema X? It's a little bit further of a drive, but we can use my car. They have those chairs where the people next to you don't touch you, while the closer Cinema Y does not. I don't like touching, you know. Autistic -smile-.
Them: Stop being such a snowflake! Everyone else can deal with those chairs, I'm sure you can too.
I'm aware I'm asking them to do something for me with nothing in return, but it really is a big deal for me. How can I achieve this better?
*This means, in simple terms, that I have more brain-connections, which means I can easily get overstimulated. My brain uses more resources than for most people, which means I get tired faster. In very rare cases I can have an autistic meltdown, where some parts of my brain, like the language processing part, shut down. Sometimes autism causes underdeveloped social skills and/or language skills. It's different for everyone. I lack most of the autism traits you see in the media. My social skills are a little below average, but far from bad. Because of this, people tend to question whether I really have autism. This seems to stem from a misunderstanding of what autism really is. I often get told "Oh, but you're so social!". I usually answer by explaining that social skills can be learned and that I've got sensory issues.
